As of right now, we require you to input a valid credit card number. Every time you screw up when entering your password, you will be charged $20 for the first offense, $40 for the second, and $100 after that. You must change your password weekly, between 3 and 4 a.m. every Monday morning following these guidelines:
-Your password must be no less than 25 and not more than 27 characters.
-You can use any English or Greek letters, either upper or lower case.
-You can use Arabic numbers, Roman numerals, Babylonian, or Indian. Remember that the first non-controversial use of a specific symbol for the decimal digit 0 didn't occur until 876 AD.
-You can use some special characters, but we're not sure just which ones yet.
-You cannot use proper names of family members or dog or cat pets, but you can use the names of pet gold fish, fowl, or amphibians.
-You can't use names of geographical places with the exception of the name of any town in Nepal.
-You can use a mathematical formula, but you must solve it for x when y equals 4. Show all your work.
-You will get banned for life if your password contains a smiley face.
-You password can be an active link, except to one of those cute little kitten videos on Facebook.
We hope this new policy will not be a burden. Thank you for taking responsibility for our failure to keep your most personal information secure.